Tag Archives: rants

Stage 32: The thoughts of a person who can’t write.

It’s the sadness that pushes us. The gnawing, tugging, inescapable emotions that drag us into our creative zones. Writing is a catharsis and there’s no need for it unless you’re looking for an escape; for the reason a reader reads and a writer writes is the same.

And when you’re content, there is no need for an escape- *introducing the all new and improved ‘writers block’. Now in 4 different shades of frustration.*

It’s every artists internal conflict. For them to create they have to have inspiration, for inspiration they need an extreme emotion, for an extreme emotion they need exhilaration or depression, the latter being much easier to achieve when you have no inspiration and thus the vicious cycle begins.

What to do, what to do, what to do.

Take a break I guess. Go out, switch off, forget. I say I guess because evidently I still can’t write. Atleast nothing along the lines of profound or mildly entertaining.

Sorry for wasting your time if you made it this far.

But a word of advice because I never publish a post without something quotable ( ✔️ ) and something kinda sorta not really helpful- Don’t force yourself to create something that has to be appreciated… just. create.


Well, i woke up to that faint blue light that I now so easily recognise (c.e. https://itswaypastcurfew.wordpress.com/2016/06/01/stage-7-34-progress/ , where i flipped out, seeing it for the first time)

WordPress informed me that it was our 2 year anniversary. Possibly the longest any of my relationships have ever lasted (platonic and romantic).  *cringing at this sad truth*

Also I haven’t been able to write at all lately and this is more or less a forced post and I have to end up asking myself the question ‘ why can we write so much better when our life is going to the dogs?’

Diary of an Over-thinker: 2

Let me set the scene for you.

It’s a pleasant, cool day. You stand around nonchalantly with a group of people. Banter is being passed around like a ball and a contest of wit seems to be taking place. Generally a satisfying spell has seized control of the day. That is until

 

Irrelevant person 1: “and then i said to her if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate!!”

*unanimous laughter at punny chemistry joke*

You: “hey that reminds me irrelevant person 3, did you watch that documentary?”

Irrelevant person 3: …

*pause before you attempt to ask the deaf irrelevance your question again*

You: ” Did you see that docum-”

Irrelevant person 3: “Oh btw guys (proceeds to talk about irrelevant topic)”

You: *cue feelings of wanting to move to Lithuania to sell cats for a living*

 

Not being heard and having to repeat yourself is the worst. The only thing worse than that is having to repeat yourself and not being heard again. ( and the only thing worse than THAT is it happening with your crush but that’s a whole other post).

I mean I know it’s kind of dramatic to feel so worthless, but that is EXACTLY how you feel. I don’t know why, but the insecurities just thrive off of moments like those. It’s the most terrifying thing that can happen to you and somehow it leaves you feeling like the least important human on the planet. It leaves you feeling irrelevant.

Overthinking coupled with abandonment issues and crippling social anxiety- Life’s peachy keen.

Stage 30: 30 going on 30

I hit 30 followers 2 days ago preceding my 30th post. Now i know 30 might seem like an ant of a number in the grand scheme of things, however, it is a great big deal to me.

When i started blogging again in the summer of 2016, i promised myself i wouldn’t let this blog rot away abandoned like i had last time. And i didn’t.

I get bored very easily and this is an accomplishment for me. It proves to me, my passion, for writing and comforts my decision to pursue Journalism. It proves the one person who knew about my blog last year and laughed at it, wrong. It proves that I can do something if I wholeheartedly make it my priority. It proves me wrong.

So here is to 30 followers, 1000 hits (YES 1000! ), and many more posts to come.

Stage 26: We, Wyself and Wi

It’s not the fact that anything changed between us… not a relationship status or our physical presence. But for some reason, almost disappeared, has our mental connection.

I cant place it but we’re different

Our conversations

Our exchanges

Our everything

Something’s different about us 

I blame you and you might blame me. Truth is there is no-one to blame. Nothing happened, but we changed. We both changed somehow. Unable to foster the parallel we used to share, we both are rendered helpless.

We miss each other but we can’t be together.

We tell each other but it doesn’t change anything.

It doesn’t change the fact that we lost it.

We misplaced a feeling and now It’s gone. Maybe not forever. but heck it sure is taking a long time to find… I’ll fight for it though. I’ll fight like I’ve never lost before, but you need to fight too.

Please fight. Fight hard.

Fight for us.

Diary of an over-thinker : 1

‘I appreciate it’

HOW ON EARTH DO YOU RESPOND TO THIS. How. there is actually no valid, logical response to this phrase from hell.I propose that we ban this phrase. We need to sign a petition that just kills this phrase and makes it illegal to say.

You can’t just say ‘you’re welcome’ because that’s insinuating that the person should have thanked you or just comes off as plain sarcastic.

If you say ‘no problem’ or ‘anytime’ it makes it seem like you’ve done them a huge favour even though it might have been something of equal importance to you.

I mean if this happens on chat, you’re lucky- send a heart emoji and you’re good. But what about when it’s in person. WHAT IS THE APPROPRIATE RESPONSE THEN?????????

You can’t just smile- that’s rude and cold and you seem stuck up.

I mean you could just tell them to shut up, grab them and *bearhug*… but what if they’re not a hugger or you aren’t at that level of friendship yet or it really wasn’t a big deal.. like what if you just opened the door for someone.. IM SO CONFUZZLED

Conclusion: Just walk away… move to Easter Island and change your name to Cheesebiscuit because there is actually no turning back from this point on. You have just reached the boss level and not just any boss. Like Bowser boss level. So yeah basically impossible to beat. ( i swear if you could beat Bowser then marry me)